To get through life and literally every single day, there are a few songs that I listen to on repeat and some other songs that I listen to when certain aspects of my life are needing extra support.
Last semester for one of my social work classes, we had an extra credit assignment where we submit a healing mixtape, and I put most of these songs on it!
Daily replays for chronic mental and physical illness: I've been listening to these first four songs since I was young
Stand in the Rain by Superchick * my favorite one out of all of these...my go to when I feel like I am crumbling to pieces...if you know me personally and listen to the lyrics, I feel like it shouldn't be surprising...this song is part of why I am so fucking stubborn, steadfast, and push my limits.
Keep Holding On by Avril Lavigne * "Keep holding on, just stay strong...cause you know we'll make it through."
I Believe by Chritina Perri * "I have felt the pain of losing who you are. I have died so many times, but I. am. still. alive..." I tend to listen to this when I am feeling most hopeless about my dynamic chronic disabilities & grieving everything I have lost and keep losing because of my limitations..."this is not the end of me, this is the beginning... (repeat)"
Human by Christina Perri * "I can take so much...'til I've had enough. Cause I'm only human. I crash and I break down."
Terrible Love by Birdy * "it takes an ocean not to break..." yeah
Fierce Flawless by Ani DiFranco * "she's got a little tin cup with her heart in it to bang along the bars of her rib cage..."
Wonderful Life by Smith and Burrows * this is a new daily, for the past year or so
Every Time the Sun Comes Up by Sharon Van Etten * this is a new daily, for the past few months
"every time the sun comes up, I'm in trouble...every time the sun comes up, I see double..."
Mental Health Flare-ups: Trauma, Major Depressive Disorder, Suicidal ideation...
Replay by Lady Gaga * "the scars on my mind are on replay, replay...there's a monster inside who is torturing me..." Gaga is one of my many heros who I couldn't even fathom meeting...Most of the album this and the next song are on are all about Gaga's PTSD related to her sexual assault & her road to freedom.
911 by Lady Gaga * "my biggest enemy is me, ever since day one, pop a 911 then pop another one."
Diamond Heart by Lady Gaga * "Some asshole broke me in, wrecked all my innocence. I'll just keep go-going..."
Til it Happens to You by Lady Gaga * this song is about sexual assault and was written for a documentary called Hunting Grounds about sexual assault and rape on college campuses... the music video is graphic, so I posted the lyric video instead. Gaga also performed this song at the 2016 Oscars with many survivors on stage with her, I sobbed watching it.
Rainbow by Ke$ha *"yeah, maybe my head's fucked up but I'm falling right back in love with life..."
Learn to Let Go by Ke$ha * "choose redemption, your happy ending is up to you..."
I Told You Everything by Sharon Van Etten
We are Fine by Sharon Van Etten
Recover by Ruelle * "are we too deep in the night to see the day? are we too frozen inside to feel the flame?"
Glass by Kate Grahn * "you wanna see my pain? cause I can show it..."
I Laugh When I'm With Friends But Sad When I'm Alone by 070 Shake
Bring Me to Life by Evanescence
Bury a Friend by Billie Eilish * "honestly, thought I would be dead by now..."
Bellyache by Billie Eilish * "everything I do, the way I where my noose, like a necklace..."
Running Up that Hill by Kate Bush * yes, since it got popular again from season 4 of Stranger Things, they do a good job at depicting mental illness!
Summertime Sadness by Lana Del Rey * (my depression always flares during summer due to heat and flares, so this one is a fitting summer song) which I am getting very nervous about with our first very HOT week of summer coming...you can find me hermiting in my apartment with the AC blasting and the lights low most of this summer. I fell about a month ago and got a concussion that I am still recovering from and just found out I mildly dislocated part of my neck from...gotta love chiropractors and massage therapy.
Here is the album I typically play when I am trying to relax, sleep, or focus on homework sometimes depending on my energy. The late Julee Cruise, whom I first discovered through watching Twin Peaks!
"Floating Into The Night" (1989) * link to the full album
"The World Spins" is my favorite song on her album, "light and shadow change the walls...falling through this night alone..."
Yes, I know this list is mostly white artists, and women. I lean towards women or gay artists giving healing vibes for me personally. Maybe I will come out with another list when I can talk with more people about this.
What are songs that keep you going? Songs that heal or validate your experiences?
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