The thing that is in my chest is a paperclip-sized heart monitor. I thought it wasn’t going to be noticeable. I thought it was going to be invisible to me. It isn’t. It is quite annoying.
When you think of a chest, you don’t think of boobs being in the way--they are. And guess where the monitor is placed? In my fucking boob. Right above the fourth rib. So, if you are a person that has boobs, countdown to the fourth rib and you’ll see where they would have placed yours. It is right under the skin of my left boob--right next to my sternum.
The best and worst part is that you can feel it sitting right under my skin. I say it is the best because it feels cool as fuck. I say it is the worst because I have accidentally moved it around and can literally hear my breast tissue being stirred--which I am sure it isn’t supposed to do that. Another reason I say that it is the “worst,” is because when I am holding my baby cousins on my chest or feeding them--it hurts. My chest becomes painful when it has contact with anything. But when I am holding my adorable cousins and giving them sustenance--I don’t care about the pain.
How can I care about the pain when I am holding something as precious as my baby cousin?
The scar on my boob is thicker than I thought it would be too. But that may be because I did pick at it while it was healing. Plus I am sure it will continue to shrink as time goes on--until they have to cut it out of me…
I also said that I was going to talk about my procedure to get it in. It went well. I was awake the entire time. It took like less than five minutes to just put it in. The prep took like two hours--which was a little ridiculous. But I did want fluids. I always want fluids. I had great nurses and hilarious doctors. You know how in Grey’s they talk and crack jokes...yeah, that’s what it is like. My cardiologist was cracking jokes the entire time. It was great! So, in a way, I did enjoy the procedure. Recovery also didn’t take as long as I thought it would. I had pain for a couple of days. And obviously still have some pain every once and awhile, as I said before.
I am so glad that my mom and youngest brother, Ayden, could come with to keep me company and make me laugh. I was incredibly nervous all week and the morning of--leading up to the procedure. Ask my neighbors and friends, they had to calm my ass down. I was fine as soon as I got to the hospital--which I knew I would be--thankfully. My mom and Ayden even spent the night with me. Which was something I enjoyed. I never really get to see them. Maybe once every month if we’re lucky. Maybe once every other month. It is difficult to visit family with my busy schedule. I will get to see them this upcoming Easter weekend--which will be nice and interesting.
One thing I almost forgot to mention is that the hospital gave me a demo heart monitor to keep. So, I keep that in my purse to show people. I am glad they gave it to me because people are always so interested in health stuff. And people always ask questions that I can’t answer...so, I just show it to them and they sometimes shut up.
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