Redefining 'normal'

I was told that I set unrealistic expectations for myself. I thought that when I was diagnosed with POTS that, sure it would be hard but, that I could handle it. I can handle it but it is one of the hardest things that I have ever had to deal with in my life, so far. I have been overwhelmed recently about my treatment options (there are so many) and it takes so much time and effort. I am a full time college student, thinking about going to law school. I should not be thinking about treatment options and trying new medications, I should be thinking about whether or not I want to go law school and how I am going to pay for it. Since I have been overwhelmed with all of this, I think about it all the time. I try to keep it in and act like I am totally fine with how my life is changing, there are those unrealistic expectations. But I am not fine, so I will keep it in for as long as I can, then one day a flood of emotions come out. Being diagnosed with a chronic illness that I have to live with for the rest of my life is physically and emotionally draining. So, when those emotions come out the only thing I know to do best is talk to someone that has been a huge support ever since I was diagnosed. During our conversation, I learned that I have unrealistic expectations and that I need to redefine my ‘normal.’ I have been living with this illness for about four years but have only known for five months. So, right know I am grieving the loss of my ‘normal’ life. Such as, being a typical college girl, not being able to do simple things anymore, finding a treatment and meds that work for me, not knowing when the bad days will come, possibly skipping class because I don’t feel good (I have already had to do that), possibly embarrassing myself in front of someone by passing out. There is just so much change when I was diagnosed that I have to redefine my ‘normal.’ I have to redefine it to something that is easier for me to live a full and happy life. So I can finish school and get a career on track and maybe go to law school.