My Not-So-Fun New Diagnoses...

First, I need to mention why I haven't blogged in a while--at least on my own blog that I created almost two years ago. I can't believe it has almost been two years! That is crazy, anyway, there are many, many reasons to as why I haven't written. I will try to explain myself in this hopefully not too long of a post but if you know me it will be...

I didn't know what to write:

Last semester, I was going through a lot of stuff and kept thinking that I should post things or at least one thing on this blog but I just didn't know what to post. And I didn't want to "come out" yet with my new diagnoses that I was still unsure about and was still in denial about--which I will get to later in this post.

I started writing for another blog:

Last August, I started writing for Oydessy. It is a blog where I can write about many different topics that come up in my brain of mine. I wanted to write from something other than my own blog that I created because writing for someone else I can actually put on my resume. Also, these days, anyone can start their own blog. So, writing for another one made my writing more valid and more important. Not saying this is less important. I can also be 100% more free and honest in this blog. Which can be nice.

I was really busy:

Last semester, I worked over or about 40 hours a week, while going to school full-time and dealing with an illness. Not to mention dealing with family and friend drama at the same time. Which goes back to me not knowing what to write. Balancing out my schedule was a task in itself. Not only did I have a full-time school schedule but I was working four jobs and had an internship. Crazy--right? I honestly don't know how I survived...

New diagnoses:

I guess now that my denial has gotten better I finally feel somewhat more comfortable to come out and talk about my new and not-so-fun diagnoses--I guess I will. If people even read this post... 

Last spring semester, I started showing signs of depression. It only continued to get worse until some professors, some friends and some family started noticing my erratic behavior. I know what caused my depression but I can't get into that right now. So, it only continued to get worse and worse through the summer and the fall semester. I started anti-depressants over my winter break and I started seeing a counselor over my January term and I still see her. I am no longer ashamed of my depression and I am no longer ashamed of seeing a counselor. It is a part of life that a lot of people unfortunately go through. 

I was also diagnosed with PTSD. I have been living with this for longer then my depression but I am not comfortable with telling people why I have it--yet. But the stigmas around both--PTSD and depression are ridiculous. That is part of the reason I am not going to talk about what caused them in my life because there are also even more ridiculous stereotypes and stigmas around that. I just don't feel like defending myself over something that happened to me--a TRAUMA that happened to me. 

However, if you are truly concerned about me and you want to reach out to me about this don't be afraid. I am a very open person and if I feel trusting enough with you--I may talk to you about it. You can message me on Facebook or text me.